“Hey Mom, can we go to the pool today?”

My mind immediately jumped to my to-do list, the laundry I needed to get caught up on, the meal planning that had to happen, and the work I wanted to dive into so the start of my week didn’t get away from me. Not to mention, I had no extra help with the Bearded Gent currently being away at camp with our oldest two sons for the past few days. I was tired. And it was obvious in that moment that old mindsets were creeping in.

I glanced out the window and noticed the overcast weather. The water would be colder, I thought. Maybe he won’t want to go then. I pulled out my phone to check my weather app and saw that rain was moving in later that day. “Oh buddy, I don’t know. The water is going to be a bit colder with no sun and we are supposed to get rain.”

With a hopeful face, he quickly looked out the window and back at me… “but it’s not raining right now!”

“I know, but….” I was beginning to lose the argument. That damn to-do list ran through my head while he stared back at me with pleading eyes and it just hit me. Why was I trying to find excuses? What was so important that I couldn’t spare 30 minutes? It was a Saturday morning and it’s summer for crying out loud. Why was I not racing to put my suit on and dive in with them? After all, before we know it, the chill of autumn and the snow of winter will have us craving this time again. I know, because I will be the one complaining during the next snowstorm that descends on Nashville. Always the girl wanting what she doesn’t have.

And maybe this is me feeling all the feels as I watch the next 21 days tick down on the calendar when our first will be headed off to college, but man – time slips through our fingers and we don’t even realize it. The question we need to ask ourselves no matter what season of life we are in is:

Are we busy living our lives, or just busy being busy?

Am I too consumed with chasing success, glorifying busy, and building the life I want for my family that I am missing out on living the life I already have?

I am currently in a season of hustle in my business, rebuilding after an extended break following our daughter’s diagnosis. And while I don’t think we need to be ashamed in saying that we are hustling or grinding, I do think we need to re-think the hustle and HOW we are doing it.

In today’s fast-paced world, especially as ambitious individuals, we often equate busyness with success. Heck, we sometimes glorify being busy. We fill our calendars with tasks, and meetings, and striving to achieve more and more. But in this relentless pursuit of building a life of freedom, one where we don’t have to answer to anyone else, we risk enjoying the freedom we currently have. We risk actually living life that is happening now.

Perhaps this all stems from those of us who grew up with mothers who toted their Franklin Covey day planners like holy relics. But times have changed and we know better – this glorification of busyness that we wore like a badge of honor for years, packed schedules and long to-do lists as a testament to our dedication and drive – we know better. And we need to move past it. We need to change our thinking. Why? Because many of us know all too well that this glorification of busy can lead to burnout, stress, and a disconnect from the things that actually bring us joy – that actually make us feel fulfilled in our daily life. And isn’t THAT the goal?

Success isn’t just about what we achieve; it’s also about how we live along the way. Cultivating a well-designed life means being intentional with our time, savoring the little things, and finding as much of a balance as possible between ambition and presence.

It’s time to rethink the hustle

Because the reason for the hustle is to have more time with our people, more time to live life on our own terms. So how can we do this? How can we embrace intentional living as a practical, everyday choice, rather than seeing it as a buzz phrase or a luxury reserved for those who have discovered some elusive secret to life? Here are a few things I wrote down that have helped me to keep intentionality at the forefront of my mind. Sort of a way to come back to myself, to stay centered and grounded.

1. Prioritize Your Well-Being

Make self-care an absolute non-negotiable part of your routine. Whether it’s a morning walk, a yoga session, or simply taking time to read a book, prioritize activities that are going to nourish your body and mind. I promise you, this will keep you from going down a road of self-destruction. We ambitious folk are very good at turning a blind eye to our own needs and it does not end well usually (I speak from experience).

2. Create Boundaries & Don’t Apologize for them

Set clear boundaries between work and personal time. Designate specific hours for work and make sure to disconnect and be present with your family during personal time. Never has making six figures in my business hindered on whether I stayed up past midnight to complete a task or not. Facts. And nothing is ever an emergency. Truly. Think about the times you have allowed your personal life to be interrupted by work. See what I mean?

Setting boundaries can also be applied to other areas of our personal lives. You don’t need to volunteer for everything in order to be a good parent. And you don’t need to fill your calendar with social obligations when you feel like all you want to do is enjoy some downtime at home. 

Less is forever more.

3. Savor the Little Things

I know a popular idea is to “romanticize your life”. And when you find yourself racing from volleyball practice to the store for forgotten dinner ingredients all while trying to return an email and re-schedule the dental appointment you missed, it’s hard to get lost in the romance of life. However, I truly think there is something to this concept. We just have to slow down enough in order to relish in things.

Find joy in the simple moments of your day. Maybe it’s enjoying the quiet and alone time in your morning routine or watching your kids swim on a Saturday morning (*note to self*), but remember to savor these small but meaningful experiences.

4. Practice Gratitude

This was something I implemented in our homeschool routine a few years ago – gratitude journals. A way for the kids to begin their day thinking about all that they have. And wouldn’t you know? Us adults could use this in our daily life as well. When I began starting my days with physically writing down a few things that came to mind that I was grateful for, my days suddenly felt brighter and the stress load seemed lighter.

Cultivate a habit of gratitude. Reflecting on what you’re thankful for can shift your focus from what’s missing (and all that you are hustling for) to the abundance already present in your life. Because I promise, it’s there. You just have to adjust your focus.

5. Simplify Your Schedule

Following my bout with burnout and the physical effects it had on my nervous system, I got really good at saying no. Like, really good. And it has been the most healing thing. Learn to say no to activities, obligations, or anything else in your personal life or work life that don’t align with your priorities. Focus on what truly matters and eliminate unnecessary commitments that drain your energy.

6. Connect with Loved Ones

Building strong relationships and creating lasting memories with loved ones are fundamental to a well-designed life. Close the laptop, silence the notifications, and spend quality time with those you love. We all need as much of that as possible.

7. Reflect, Adjust, & Reevaluate As Needed

Take time to reflect on life regularly. Assess your goals and priorities. Assess what you are working towards. Are you living intentionally? Are your goals aligned with the life you want to live? Do you feel like you have the space to enjoy life? Use these reflections to make necessary adjustments and stay aligned with your vision – don’t just chase success. Always have a why behind the grind.

_____

If you were left wondering what happened, yes. We did in fact hit the pool that Saturday morning. And the water was cold, but we had so much fun as simple as it was. And the world didn’t crumble. Things got done that day and what didn’t? They didn’t matter as much as I thought.

But the most important thing? My kids got to see their mom be present. They got to see her say yes. Even among all of the to-do’s and full plate. And at the end of the day, that’s what I want the most. I want my loved ones to know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I am always ready to jump right in.

Remember, the best parts of our lives are found in those spaces between all the busyness. By being intentional with our time and focusing on what truly matters, we can create a life that is not only successful but also deeply fulfilling. 

After all, the real journey is not just about building a life, but truly living it.